Coach Markus Launching That Fire on King Bee
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Fellas,
Great confessional as usual but one of your emailers (King Bee) made me unexpectedly Hulk out! Rarely, has a fan email had me so pissed off!!! What immediately dropped the match in the gas was his first comment; “The fans of this show are entitled to their opinion but holy shit their opinion is wrong!”. Since when did he become an expert on everyone else’s opinion? An opinion (by definition) is someone’s judgement not necessarily based on fact. Rog didn’t necessarily like the Jesus scene. His opinion. I thought is was fine. My opinion. Others thought it was great! Their opinion. You see how this is supposed to work?
2nd comment:
“This whole show is a lame dick attempt at building flash, style and hype without any solid foundation.” Normally this wouldn’t bother me except for the fact that the author of the book Neil Gaiman has either helped write and/or given his approval on the scripts for the show. So, the “solid foundation” that is supposedly missing has helped create the fucking show! Plus, the creator or foundation or whatever you want to call him, cites this episode as one of his favorites.
Tangent Alert!!! (but stick with me)
There are 3 things that make me an awesome football coach. 1) I love kids 2) I love football and study the game 3) I made it to the highest level in my craft (Fly Eagles Fly) But every year, there are parents who think they know more than me. Only want to complain about how I SHOULD be coaching but never want to grab a whistle and get involved.
There are 3 things that make Neil Gaiman an incredible author. 1) He brought notoriety and relevance to a niche genre (Goth) 2) His Sandman comics helped turn comic books into “reading material”, not just kid’s books 3) His 100+ literary awards make him a master at his craft.
I am sure The King Bee is writing some kick-ass novel, that will win tons of awards, be turned into a TV Series and will unite all opinions on its greatness. Maybe they’ll even be a podcast about it. The funny thing is, I agreed with some (not all) of his points but I always get seriously annoyed when someone TELLS me what my opinion should be.
Us usual, you guys are the Shat! But that’s just MY opinion.
Coach Markus
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Okay Coach, here goes… and just a heads up, while I don’t intend this as a personal attack, its gonna get inflammatory.
I’m so tired of people with poor or shallow tastes defending shitty opinions with the tired trope “Opinions cant be wrong…” While the definition refers to opinions as “judgments not necessarily based on facts” I’m almost certain we could agree that they are judgments based on ones perception of facts…
SO to that I’d like to amend my previous statement to what I believe more accurately reflects my sentiment:
“The opinions of the fans of this show are based upon faulty perceptions and a poor taste for quality because this show is a turd. There may be one or two nourishing tid-bits inside that turd but I damn sure don’t want to ingest it again to find out. You can go ahead and help yourself though.”
Here’s an illustration for you. When I was a kid I made a sandwich. A slice of white bread with a tight spiral of ketchup, two slices of baloney, a fistful of ruffles potato chips crunched up on top, topped by another swirl of ketchup and another slice of white bread. Then I’d press the sandwich between two paper plates to mash the chips into the bread and ketchup, then Id toss it in the fridge to make sure it was cold as possible.
I ate the shit out of those things as a kid, couldn’t get enough, but today that shit sounds disgusting. I wouldn’t feed it to your dog. Now it WAS my opinion that was a fantastic lunch, but I think we can collectively say today, that shit is gross.
Opinions can be complete and total bullshit if you really open your eyes to whats out there.
So much imagery in this show is paraded out to no fucking purpose. The jesus scene, it brings NOTHING to the show. It doesn’t hint at the future jesus party, it doesn’t lead to anything relevant regarding Vulcan, it serves no fucking purpose… The stuff with Bilquis does fucking nothing for the story, its some tits here and there but it doesn’t affect the protagonists of your story in the least… “But you gotta wait to see it come together….” or some similar shit might be trumpeted by “fans” but the facts are here in front of us, they don’t come together, her time on screen did nothing for the story…
Combining piss poor acting performances from Ricky Whittle and friends, Grandiose imagery that amounts to not much more than cinematic jerking off, and a tedious fucking pace and completely disengaging musical score make for a shitty television experience.
“But Orlando Jones is so great!” says Gene, SO FUCKING WHAT! Hes in the fucking show for a total of 6 minutes, he doesn’t save ten hours of bullshit with a shiny suit and beaming smile.
One bad apple spoils the bunch, how many shitty apples do you fucking need to eat before you wake up?! The fans seem to be making excuses for this show for reasons I cant comprehend. Yeah theres a couple good moments in this show but overall THIS SHOW SUCKS, it fails on so many more marks than it succeeds. Get your scorecard out, pull your head out of your ass and get realistic.
Niel Gaiman is JUST OKAY. Hes written just as much bullshit as he has good stuff. Bringing notoriety to the goth genre?! Fucking please, have you ever met an aging goth?? They’re fucking embarrassing. Helped turn comic books into “reading material” FFUUUUUUCCCKKK OOOOFFFFFFFF with that shit. Will Eisner was pioneering comics as literature at least 30 years before that sandman shit, which isnt bad, but lets not pretend hes the fucking beatles of comic books. Fucking Classics Illustrated from Dell Publishing did more for comics as literature than Neil Gaiman… As for awards, these are industry awards that I take with a grain of salt… Ask Kanye West how he feels about Taylor Swifts awards and then get back to me.
To wrap it up, I haven’t written a kick-ass novel, but I don’t have to in order to know a bullshit story. You don’t own a chain of bbq restaurants but based on your twitter feed I’d totally eat lunch at your house. But I wouldn’t want to watch TV with you because this show sucks. You know it sucks, you agree with a few of my points on why it sucks, but when it comes down to it, you’re making excuses rather than using a critical eye.